Week 2: Outsider/Insider

I think many people who are also bi-culture may have many of the similar experiences I have. Being an Asian American, I often feel in between the two sides and never completely one or the other. My knowledge about my Taiwanese/Chinese heritage mostly comes from my family, but growing up in such a diverse place as Los Angeles, I'm very different from other members of my family who grew up elsewhere. I get aspects of American and Southern California culture all mixed in with everything else.

I came to the U.S. when I was six years old and the first time I went back to Taiwan since I had been in America was when I was seventeen years old. My grandfather took me to the mountain to visit the aboriginal villages in order to show me a bit of the Taiwanese culture that is often overlooked. As expected, the village has been heavily commercialized as a tourist attraction. We watched a traditional harvest dance performance. The music was actually a pre-recorded track played from a CD and they did not have any live musicians. The dancers dressed in bright red skirts and vests with feather headpieces and bells strapped to their wrists and ankles. Thinking back, the ornaments attached to their outfits helped add to the music of the performance. There was also a lot of clapping and stomping. This is similar to the Oceania performances we watched in class today. The early Taiwanese aboriginals did have some connections to many other groups in the Pacific Islands.

After the performance, the dancers went around thanking the audience. I remember complimenting one of the dancers in Mandarin and the dancer was shocked that I spoke Mandarin. The whole time during the dance, I felt that this was part of my history and heritage, but when that dancer looked at me, she could not believe that I was Taiwanese like her. Even though my family moved to the city a few generations ago, we still had the same origins as the dancer. I can't believe that I felt that I was just as Taiwanese as the dancer, while the dancer looked like me as a complete foreigner. I wasn't offended by her reaction, just surprised. I still remember the exact surprised look she had when I told her I was Taiwanese and I won't forget it.